Okay, now I know I am dating myself here but I want to talk about something special to me.
When I was a young girl, I don’t even remember how old I was when I saw this short film. It was titled “The Red Balloon”. Have you seen it?
If you have, you will remember the story vividly. If you have never seen it, you are still a young one and that’s okay, this is for you as well.
There was this little boy who came across this big, bright, beautiful red balloon. Everywhere he went, it followed him. He came to depend on it being outside of wherever he was at, waiting patiently for him until one day it wasn’t.
He started to search for it and search all around town but could not find it. Sometimes he would spot it high in the sky (if I remember it correctly). He would try to reach out to it but to no avail, this beautiful, red balloon always seemed out of his reach.
I think eventually the balloon burst and it was no more. The sad boy walked away, head down for he had lost this big, bouncy, red balloon.
I happened to see this movie once again when I joined Netflix a few years back. It was then that I spent a lot of time drawing in charcoal. I was experimenting and I came up with this concept.
I call it “First Heartbreak”. It’s a simple sketch, not a lot of detail but I loved how it came out and to my surprise many people have liked it. At one time I had it listed and it was the second most viewed image I had on a p.o.d. site.
I could not understand why that was so.
When I look at this piece, I see the innocence in the little girl’s eyes. When you are young and your heart is broken, it can be a shock to your system. You don’t know what hit you. You fall in love for the first time and like Sheryl Crow sings, “The first cut is the deepest”, It’s a pain that is indescribable.
I think she is referring to that first heartbreak. You don’t have any experience of what it feels like but it feels like someone slashed through your heart and you feel, you really feel like the hurt is never going to stop.
Looking back to my past, thinking back to that first time I thought I was in love. I remember what that first heartbreak felt like years ago. I can certainly relate to the expression of the little girl holding her torn red heart balloon, floating at half-mast. Tha represents that a part of you, that trusting and innocent part of you, that openness of your heart that died.
You are no longer innocent in love.
Looking back to that time and all the time in between, I realize that yes, that first heartbreak hurts the most. As you grow up and learn from your experiences, you become wiser, stronger and better prepared to handle all kinds of heartbreaks that may cross your path.
No one wants to feel heartbreak, I know I don’t but life has those, along with all the other good stuff. And for me? It is the good stuff I choose to focus on.
After many years of living and loving, I can look back on that first heart break and realize the hurt did not last forever and a day.
Like the body recovering from a wound or a broken bone, it hurts so much when it happens. After some time and healing, the pain become less and less.
You may have a little scar like the red balloon but the balloon is still floating. And it’s going to be okay.
All Life is Art if you look close enough-Bricadena